Title: The Power of Self-Love and Empathy

Today's blog is going to be a little different. We are going to bring in a small language arts lesson to help make the point clearer. Hopefully, it will drive home the point that I feel has been made very clear to me in recent days in a lesson of self-grace and self-love. When I talk about self-love, I'm not referring to the kind of love that builds up the ego and helps you feel better when you look in the mirror. I'm talking about the kind of self-love that changes the way you talk to yourself, the way you feel about yourself when you are alone. What does that person sound like? What does that internal dialogue bring up? Would you talk to others the way you talk to yourself in those moments?

Let's first take a look at Mark 12:31, "Love your neighbor as yourself." It is a simple statement that I have read and heard preached many times. So, let's break down that verse into its grammatical parts through a quick analysis.

Subject: "you"

Object: "neighbor"

Verb: "love"

Preposition: "as"

In this sentence, the subject is "you," referring to the person being addressed. To be subject to something means to be under its authority or control, to be governed or influenced by it. It implies being in a position of submission or obedience to that thing or person. So it implies there is an input of some sort. The object is "neighbor," indicating the person who should be loved. To be object to something means to be the target or recipient of its actions or effects. It implies being on the receiving end of something, often in a passive or submissive role. So this implies there in an output coming from you. The verb is "love," expressing the action being performed. The preposition "as" is used to compare the love for the neighbor to the love for oneself. Have you compared your love for yourself and your expression of grace, empathy, and understanding of yourself to the way you would want to treat a neighbor that you respect and want to honor lately? What type of internal dialogue have you been submitting yourself to? What input do you have on replay in that mind of yours? What actions or affects is that having on those around you?

I know in looking at my own life and my own view of "self," a form of self-criticism was always present--and of course I still struggle, it's clearly a human condition. I understand that we need to learn from past actions that didn't take into account the greater good, and perhaps caused us shame when we came to recognize such, but you don't know, until you know. The question is, when you do know, are you going to learn from it. Are you going to change? Are you going to have grace with yourself to leave that version of yourself behind instead of trying to carry it with you like some sort of shame preserving martyr? We need to evaluate ourselves and those actions to choose better and wiser actions in the future. However, we also need not allow ourselves to get hung up on the narrative that we are failures, unworthy of good, or without hope. Christ chose to scorn shame. He also says in Matthew 16:24, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." There are parts of our flesh we want to cling to, our ego does this to us, and there are also parts of ourselves that want to daily carry our shame with us in this ongoing internal narrative, a sort of self-inflicted punishment to judge ourselves unworthy and then, pay our due penance. However, if we carry around this shame narrative in our daily internal dialogue, we can never live up to the true potential Christ tries to provide us in his invitation to a life more abundant.

The significance of these elements in Mark 12:31 is that they highlight the importance of treating others with the same care and compassion that you would want for yourself. It emphasizes the idea of empathy and the Golden Rule, which is to treat others as you would like to be treated. By loving your neighbor as yourself, you are promoting kindness, understanding, and a sense of community. In correlation to that, Matthew 7:2- whatever measure we use, it will be measured to us (Matthew 7:2 paraphrased). This helps convey the idea that the consequences or outcomes of our actions will be returned to us in a similar manner.

Let's explore the definition of empathy for a deeper understanding of the "action" required first with ourselves, and then, in our relationships with others. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. It involves putting yourself in someone else's shoes and experiencing their emotions and perspectives. Empathy is an important aspect of human connection and can help foster understanding, compassion, and support in relationships.

Empathy is a form of grace and mercy. I believe God offered empathy when he took on human form and experienced all the pain-producing, emotionally triggering, life events here on this earth. He chose to share in our feelings, step into our shoes, and view our perspective. He came into our experience of "the law," the temptations it produced, and the unnecessary feelings of separation it caused. He ultimately measured out the largest portion of grace ever offered to mankind, reflecting, what I believe, is God's ultimate intention for us-- vulnerability through the safety provided in love. After all, true love casts out all fear, and He wanted relationship. He wanted to love and be loved.

If that isn't relatable, I don't know what is. If I had to choose one thing that I have always wanted, it's true love. The problem for me in life has been that I have looked for it in EVERYTHING - in others, in food, in vehicles, in materialistic things, in money, in substances, and so much more. What I have finally realized, as I have taken so much time in the last few years to self-reflect and do whatever I needed to find peace and love, is that, the very thing I wanted, has been here with me all along. Just a small deposit within me, something that was freely offered from Jesus. A promise that was reflected the moment He placed His Holy Spirit inside of me upon my request. A built in confidant. A well that never runs dry.

That spirit has borne witness to so much in my life. It has been a voice of warning at times--that I unfortunately neglected to listen to. A voice that gently reminds me that I am enough, and the ultimate source, from which I am trying to draw all my strength in recent days. If He chose to deposit that holy thing inside of me, who am I to question it? I want to reflect back to Him and measure back to Him the same love and belief He has shown me. I want to have the same strength, courage, and love that He was able to walk out when He was living in this flesh. I do not want to grieve that Spirit inside in any way by choosing to listen to a voice that is created by shame or fear. I want to choose to measure out grace when needed to forgive myself in the way He has clearly marked out and to take harsh life-lessons and apply them to change, so that my future is brighter and more hopeful than my past.

In conclusion, the power of self-love and empathy lies in treating others with the same care and compassion that we would want for ourselves. By practicing empathy, we can foster understanding, compassion, and support in our relationships. Just as God showed empathy by taking on human form and experiencing our pain, we can reflect His love and belief in ourselves. We can measure out grace and forgiveness, learning from our past actions and choosing wiser paths for the future. Remember, whatever measure we use, it will be measured to us. So let us choose to measure out love, grace, and understanding, both for ourselves and for others.

#SelfLove #Empathy #GoldenRule #Grace #Mercy #Relationships #BibleVerse #Matthew731 #Mark1231